A Halloween Countdown Lost in Time, Day 25

Man what a party, but enough of that, let's walk backwards through time to thursday nite, shall we?

How to Survive a Horror Movie

Written by Seth Grahame-Smith, this book becomes indespensible when tripping your way through various horror movies. Slashers, monster flicks, aliens, demonic possession, haunted houses, zombies; its all here. Like the subtitle says, "All the skills to dodge the kills". With a forword by Wes Craven, which is more like an apology to his movies in which all his characters fall victims to slaughter and death, how can you lose?

Leo:Well, you can skip buying it, that's a loss.

Indeedy-do! Its like Creepy and Crawley boiled down into a handbook for surviving horror, which is exactly something you guys need to make sure you know. What can we expect in this black book bible of doom? It starst off first by helping you identify if you are indeed in a horror movie, from discovering budget (looking at the surroundings and props), to discerning which or your pretty friends is a stereotype for getting offed by a slasher with a machete. From there is divides its chapters based on horror genres, then splits them up into sub-genres. These all have allusions to popular (and sometimes obscure) horror movie references (a break-down of slasher killers like Freddie and Jason, to babysitting horror legends), which are practically and hilariously plotted out to help you not get killed by random cars or zombies. Did something last summer you shouldn't have? Kill everyone who knew you did, including friends. Killer in the house you're babysitting for? Torch the house and run home. House possessed by pissed off native americans? High tail it out and don't look back (unless its for the dog).

Also detailed are harbingers of doom: things like light where it shouldn't be, deadly animals like sloths (the only animal named for a deadly sin) and ravens/crows, or boobies. And besides tips on what you should do when your corn has children in it are practical tips like how to stay awake for a week straight (including dietary concerns, temperature, and stimulants), or how to outsmart a devil posessed vehicle (get wet), or even what to bring for a sucessful exorcism (a healthy young priest, the right bible passages, and buckets of holy water). While all told tongue in cheek and jokingly, these small gems are there if you need them for other reasons besides the Terrorverse kind (though I would hope it wouldn't).

The illustrations are coomposed of nothing but thick lines, reds/blacks/whites/some pinks, and snarling beasts. Its not asthetically pleasing as, say Kanon or Air, but at least the beasts and killers look like they'd kill you if they could somehow step out of the pages and down your throat. I like them; they remindd me of Madd Matt and puppies wanting to tear out your intestines.

Also included is a pretty comprehensive list of great horror movies for not only thrills but for additional study materials. If you've ever wanted a list of the must-sees and dont' feel like turning on Bravo's 100 Scary Movie Moments, then this is where you turn. In addition to the greats, it also lists the worsts. Yes, Uwe Boll's movies are mentioned, but only one is actually described (House of the Dead is bar none the worst movie-video game conversion. HANDS DOWN), and if you thought the Leprechaun movies were bad, wait til you hear about Leprechaun: Back 2 Tha Hood. Haven't heard of it? You're a lucky, lucky bastard.

If you haven't picked up this book, you are probably what's left of the corpse some coroner is scraping off the pavement at the opening credits of the horror movie. If you wanna survive a fight with a killer doll, and not want to find out that you've been dead since 5 minutes into the flick, you better pick this book up ASAP. Then again, I can't gurantee that the moment you get it that you won't be dodging death traps and Plymouth Furies every 5 seconds. I loved this book and keep it always within arm's reach at all times. This is not a suggestion, this is a requirement for this October, and all Octobers to come: Buy this book. Or die a mierable, torturous and splatter-punk death.

*Drop your pants and make Papa proud, Lunies!*

Seven Days Left on the Halloween Countdown!

We're down to the last week, lunies. I'm wrapping up the week with Silent Hill costumes (yesteday was Henry Townsend, the day before, Harry; today was Heather, and perhaps tomorrow I shall be Mary Sunderland; Friday mayhaps Alex), given their flexibility in being "normal" clothes. My mind has been frazzled by the rendering project, and with preparations for my 9th annual Halloween party underway, its hard to find time to post about the season of pumpkins and yurei. Tonight, to unwind, I popped in Fatal Frame 2: Director's Cut on the X-Box. My god, but the x-box has an unweildy controller. Add that to my experience with FPS mode (which is so much simpler in combat that it is in exploration, I've found), and we've got a night of shots, scares, and "SHIT!"'s.

Back to the countdown. What shall we talk about tonight, kiddies? I tried uploading a FF AMV to no avail, drawing produced nothing, and things are eerily quiet in my current work "Creepy and Crawley". Many people lately have been struggling over the lack of holiday spirit, given the warmer weather lately. Its been hot here in the Golden State, and I hear its hot back east too. What with midterms and all, its no surpise that even my hardcore buds at Silent Hill Talk are a bit absent. My OCtobers haven't been the best in the past few years, but strangely, I feel invigorated. Excited. Giddy, like I used to be in middle school. I remember costumes, candy, cookies, and Halloween decorations as far as the eye could see. I dunno why, but I feel young again. Perhaps it is the coming NiGHTS game that makes me happy (whenever it comes out). I hope you guys also find some way of feeling young again too before Thanksgiving rolls around.

I dunno if I'd reviewed the book The House of Leaves, but I heartily recommend it for this time of year. Its a book that not only fucks with you like a good hour of Eternal Darkness, but gives you pause. There's a thin line between reality and fiction in the book, and sometimes, you can't tell which is which after awhile. Anyone looking for an adventure should definently pick it up.

I'vve also come to notice a lot of books (ok 3-4) concerning surviving or hunting the supernatural. I'd recently paged through the Zombie Survival Handbook, and found so much of it interesting that I'm considering picking it up for my sister (whom, like myself, are deathly terrified of zombies). Also on the reading list is the Monster Hunter's Handbook which not only details certain monsters than can be hunted as game (heaven forbid) or for sport, but has suggestions on how to find many mythical weapons such as the Spear of Destiny, Sun Wukong's staff, and Mjollnir. Most of it is told completly straight-faced, as if it were a handbook on game hunting, as is another book called Monster Spotter's Guide to North America which details monsters and mythical beasts as if they were birds to be spotted. Its a bit tongue-in-cheek too, but you kinda have to look for it. If you're one of the types who give out Halloween gifts, you might wanna try one of these.

Tomorrow, If I'm lucky, I'll do a blow out review of my new favvorite book How to Survive a Horror Movie, in which I'll help tell you how to know you're in a horror movie, how to deal with different slasher villians, offer tips on killer dolls, and eventually how to defeat the devil. ^^ Can't wait.

Well, I'm off to SleepyLand; sorry for the small ramble, but its hard coming up with things I care about and have the time to review/explain/ramble about. I'll make it up to you guys on Halloween, i swear. ~.^ See you next time, Lunies!

*Shout out to Sadako, Samara, Toshio, Linh's daughter and that kid in Phone! Let's party down, Lunies!*

7 Days....

Kozumi's Quote of the Week:
"See, we don't know the beginning and we don't know the end; all we can know about is the in-between stuff. And that, my friend, is what life is like."
--Ryuji, Ring, Chapter 6, pg 162

What's on Dez's desktop: Duo wants cake from Heero; a sketch of the members of Ju-oh-Cho from Yami no Matsuei; puppy Tsuzuki; Inuki-pachuki's puppy; Fatal Frame 2 fanart, sugar-shocked MaLoki pic.

Today, folks, is gonna be a bit long because I have a book review coming from Inha. Summer reading, people! Stop playing FF11 and start reading! Or GO OUTSIDE!

Loki: Ah yes. One short rant from our hostess. This has been another RanLune Public Service Announcement. Now shove off.

*Dropkicks Loki* Ok. Take it away, Inha.

Inha: Recently on the finished book list was Koji Suzuki's Ring and Spiral. Ring, the basis for the Ringu franchise we're all so familiar with, is an interesting journey through the mysterious and supernatural world of Sadako Yamamura's reign of terror.
At first I was wary of the novel, since I am generally cautious of translated novels and manga to begin with--

Loki: Cuz you have no faith in the dubbing world.
Inha: Would you, after ADV's decision to pick up season 2 of Matantei Loki Ragnarok's manga?
Loki: ............................Touche.

Inha: Anyway, after reading the intro, I was hooked. Suzuki's style of writing, while simple, was straight, descriptive and to the point. Slick and short, yet entertaining. Its not Tolkein, but its not 6th grade english either. Since I'm used to the thick and descriptive (and sometimes run-on sentence-heavy) author styles of Douglas Adams and Dean Koontz, Suzuki's clean cut and streamlined style was refershing and...well, fresh. The Japanese feel of simplicity shows through very well.
One thing I noticed about Suzuki's writing style was the constant change of POV. In most novels, a POV change is rare, and when it does happen, it happens, say, a chaper or two away from the main character's, especially in the case of a 3rd person POV. One rule I was taught in writing was that POV changes in 3rd person between characters should never occur in the same paragraphy or indeed the same scene. Suzuki, on the other hand, throws that idea out the window but changing the POV from character to character all in the same scene, on the same pages even. At first, I was a little confused and turned off by this style. However, as I continued to read, I felt that his constant changes where important. Sometimes it was absolutely necessary to get into another character's head in the same scene to get a feel of what's going on. Others may think its sloppy but it adds top the pace of this novel.
The characters are stunning and 3 dimensional. In both Ring and Spiral, I noticed a sort of Foil Character system going on between the main characters. In Ring, there was a foil in Ryuji and Asakawa; Ryuji was nihilistic and self-possessed, while Asakawa seemed timid, neurotic, nervous, and almost woman-like. In Spiral, Ando was a despressed and work oriented man because he had almost no one to come home to, whereas his friend Miyashita is cheery and a family man. You really feel the character's feelings, both through the POV chnages and though the vivid style of Suzuki's writing.
The dialogue is sharp and witty sometimes, but real. At the same time, its almost prose-like. Most exposition for the mystery of the famous video tape is through the quick dialogue between the main characters. The story works like a detective novel, with much of the deduction coming from the characters as they present their evidence.
The books are startlingly different from the movies, focusing on different characters and storylines. The novels work more like detective mysteries (cue Mayura's "fushigi mystery!"), while the movies are more like psychological horror thrillers and suspense with some minor scary gore (the American remake especially). Its a trip to see Ryuji determine who made the video based on some of the imagery and how some of it is recorded, or to slowly realize Sadako's motives towards Mai and Asakawa.
All in all, I really enjoyed Suzuki's novels and am eagerly awaiting the last installement of the series, Loop. The Ring story draws you in with its intrique and mystery, and even if you know how the story goes (based on maybe the manga or the movies), the plot still throws its readers for loops and surprises (no pun intended). Even the endings for the novels may seem so final, yet the next one picks up where the last one leaves off and adds yet another thread to the web of betrayal and mystery. Even this long post isn't enough to express exactly what i think about the books. I suggest looking for them and diving into the Ring and Spiral. You'll never look at video tapes the same way.
I give this book 9 out of 10.

Aro: I'd give it 10 but we're all a little biased because we all think Sadako 0wnz.
Inha: -_- In...deed.

*Til next time, Lunies!*