Random Lunacy

Ranting from a San Jose artist/amature cosplayer at its finest. Multiple personalities frequent to kibitz author. Random Lunacy: Is it sleeping...or is it dead? >>

Wednesday, June 18, 2003

Whew! Sewing takes a lot outta you! Hard to type with sore and *bleeding* fingers.....

Dea: Hey! Back to work! You haven't finished your Kurama costume *and* you're trying to finish that Takuto costume!!

Sigh....why do I always wait until the last moment?? This time it wasn't my fault! My Granny kept balking on getting the stuff for it! And now she's in Iowa!! Damn fate, damn it to hell!!! (starts weeping profusely)

Dea (yelling): Stop crying! Stop it!! Damn you! Damn you! Pull yourself together! There's no crying in COSPLAY!

Welll......that sounds like fun.....and now for something completely different: There have been rumors in the head about some love triangle going on here.....

Lex: And none have been denyied...so that means they're true.

So a crack team of personalities had been dispatched to locate the surce of the rumors. They are as follows:

Aro of Swords, top paranormal detective of the agency Pot Sticker,
Dio Maxwelle, comic creator and Master of Disguise,
and Rya Li St. John, Magic specialist and RPG avatar.

Diz: No one ever said it was the dream team.....

Aro: So, where do we start?
Dio: They say that all rumors are started somewhere with a gossiper....we must find that loud-mouth and grill him for information.
Dio: What are you, Good Cop-Bad Cop?? You're an idiot.
Rya: You need to handle this gently or you'll lose the information and the informant. You need a woman's touch.
Aro: So says the a girl who cosplays as a guy and a tomboy chick......
Rya (steely glare): ............................Dragon Slave.

(Later.......)
(Cue dimly lit room, w/ lamp and a single chair, in which is the renowned gossip and loud-mouth Lex McCloud--)
Aro (lamp in Lex's face): Where were you the night of the 32nd?
Lex (unfazed): Waxin' yo momma's fat ass.....
(Aro backhands Lex. Rya backhands Aro. Aro goes down)
Rya: Sorry about that, sweetheart. He's just a lil excitable.
Lex: No harm done. I'm used to it.
Dio: People say you got the skinny on everyone here in the Head.
Lex: People say a lot of things. People say that Osama Bin Laden and Saddam Hussein are gay lovers. (cue Aro, Dio and Rya pratfall) But what you heard was right. I'm the informant.
Dio: You're a gossiper with a big mouth and no shame.
Lex: ..............................Or that too.
Aro: If you're so smart, what is Rya's cup size?
Lex (unblinking): Double A. 34.
(Rya decks Aro and Lex and one balletic move)
Aro (suddenly fine): A woman's touch she says....... (Gets decked)
Dio: Rya, you been taking kick boxing lessons from Aelys?
Rya: How'd you guess?
Aro (to Lex as they rise): So you know anything about the rumored love triangle?
Lex: Do I? I started it.
Aro: So...?
Lex: Its not really a love triangle, see. Just some lil affair going on behind closed doors and cemetaries.
Aro: Cemetaries? If what you're saying is true, then that narrows out field down considerably.
Rya: Oh?
Aro (turning on lights): Here're the clues. I think I figured it out.
Dio (witheringly): Its not Red Herring, Aro.
Aro: Dammit...then I'm stumped.
Rya (to camera/viewers/readers): For those playing along at home, here are the clues. (cue whirling scene/flashback change) Our first clue was the positons stated for the Head---Common Sense and Manic Depressive-Undeadite.
Dio: Inha is the Intelligence, which also is a part of Common Sense, who is Lolita. Kozumi is the Conscience (though not a very good one)--
Kozu: Hey!
Rya: While the Philisophical Reasoning, also Inha, is also handled by Raz, whom is manic depressive all the time.
Aro: Okay but now we have, like,a hundred suspects.
Dio: We're not done yet, stupid. The second clue was the fact that both parties are dead.
Aro: But...there are a lot of dead people here already.
Diz: I see dead people....(looks at Lex and Aro) I see dumb people......
(Lex and Aro chase her away)
Rya: True but only a few overlap. Our dead residents are Lolita, Aro, Kozumi, Raz and Ashton.
Dio: With one new person, D, who had been recently deceased after reading Tank Cop's horrible and outright stupid and pointless pornfic.
Aro: Okay that's six, but I'm not a suspect....I have a boyfriend.
Dio: Right. The third clue was a character here without an analog love interest. We can count out Aro, Ashton and Kozumi cuz thay all have analong love interests--Kage, Effram, and Tsuzu, respectively.
Aro: Wait....how long have Effram and Ashton been dating?
Dio: Ashton doesn't date.
Aro: .............................Oh.
Rya: Which leaves Lolita, D, and Raz, as suspects left.
Lex: Discounting the fact she died, cuz I believe that love perseveres even in death---
Aro: Amen brother.
Rya (frustrated): You're missing the point.
Dio: Wanna grab a bite at the cafe? I hear the cheesecake is divine.
Aro: .......................kay. Let's get some San Miguels too.

(Much much much later.....)
Dio: Where were we?
Rya: ?? Oh yeah, the next clue. The last clue.
Dio: Cemetaries. We all know that a cemetary is where Lolita met Attikas.
Rya: And cemetaries technically have souls. And where's there's souls---
Dio: There's Raz.
Aro (munching on a croissant): Meaning...that Lolita and Raz are the ones who are having an affair.
(Long pause)
All: EWWWWWWWWWWWWW..........
Rya: No freakin' way!
Dio: That's disturbing.
Diz: I don't get it......
Aro(put off his lunch): How is that possible??
Diz (not put off her lunch): Are you going to finish that?
Lex: How'd you think I felt?
All: You came up with it!!!
Lex: Well, yeah. I just didn't think they were actually gonna hook up.....blecch....
Aro: So now what??
Dio: We better find out if this's true.....
Rya: If so, I'm gonna be kickin' a lil undead butt tonight.

What will happen next?? Will Lolita and Raziel's short-lived relationship come to a grinding halt?? Is Rya going to actaully throw down on Raz? Is there *anything* that would put Diz off her lunch?? Find out next time on Random Lunacy!!!

*Till next time, Son of Sparda!*


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